Do you see something strong and powerful? Do you see beauty and strength? Do you see all the imperfections; overweight, disappointment, regret, sadness, failure? I’m reminded of a picture of a kitten sitting in front of a mirror and seeing its reflection as a beautiful lion with a big flowing mane. What if you could change what you saw by changing what you think about yourself? What if you could see what your best friend sees in you? What if you were able to see wisdom and beauty from years of surviving life’s challenges and lessons?
When I am accused of always seeing the glass half full, I quickly make the correction that I choose to see that my cup runneth over instead. It is an expression my grandmother used to say at 100 years old, sitting at my dining room table at a holiday meal, surrounded by her family. She once commented that “This is the best chicken soup I have ever had.” My response was, “Grandma, you are 100 years old! Are you sure this is the best chicken soup?” She said, “This is the one I am eating right now, so yes, this is the best.” When I became a hypnotist, all of this wisdom began to make sense to me. I learned in my training that I can believe anything I want because a beliefs are nothing more than a thoughts that we repeat over and over again. I can choose my thoughts, my perspectives and, therefore, my beliefs. This doesn’t change anything, it only changes the way I feel.
I think we can all agree that life can be filled with challenges, and really bad things happen from time to time. If we look back at our life experiences there are many that bring sadness, regret and feelings of failure but we can also recall happiness, successes, lessons learned and things we are proud about. So, the question then becomes, when you look in the mirror, which seem to look back at you? They are all there but what you choose to focus on determines how you feel about yourself. Yes, you have a choice.
When clients come to me to lose weight, I ask them tell me what they say to themselves when they look in the mirror. The answers are similar; they look disgusting, fat, etc. I then instruct them to instead say, “I am so sorry, look what I did to you. I thought I was giving you a treat by feeding you junk. I thought I was comforting you with more ‘comfort’ foods. I’m sorry for taking you for granted and for saying unkind things to you. I love you enough to take better care of you!” Hypnosis reinforces those positive feelings and creates immediate changes in attitudes and behaviors.
Clients come to me with a myriad of issues and the view of what they see in the mirror is always a negative distortion of what they are, and certainly different than what they want to see. One woman felt powerless and like a victim because she was bullied at work by her boss. This has been a common theme lately. People who feel bullied at work by coworkers or bosses hate themselves for feeling powerless and weak. They are not powerless but they feel that way. I reminded her that she can’t control any of them, but that she has 100% control over the way she responds and 100% control over the way she allows them to affect her. Using a variety of techniques, I helped her to neutralize the negative feelings and, using hypnosis, helped her to find her power. Her power over the only thing she can control: herself. Her eating was out of control and she was having trouble sleeping. She is now seeing something different when she looks in the mirror and her behaviors have improved.
You always have a choice. What will you choose?